Fine thanks, How are you?

Greetings and Salutations.

This is my final blog from North Vancouver and i am feeling fine. Listening to Pete Yorn, getting ready for bed, thinking about strumming a guitar without strings, and dreaming about my move to Calgary tomorrow.

On the morrow, i depart for Calgary, and i am totally moved out. Well, except for a few hockey cards, and by a few i mean like, Oh' a couple thousand or more, but hey, mom and dad have lots of room now!

So i was thinking the other day of stuff to talk about on this item i call a blog, and i had a real gem of a thought, well maybe not, but it's interesting, or maybe not, but great.

I was at work a week ago, and a song came into my head. It was "Dreaming of You" by Sloan. Now "dreaming of you" is a decent song. I like Sloan, so, i like it more then the average man might, but regardless, the point it, when i first heard this song, i had a crush on a girl, and we were getting to know each other, and uh, we were seeing if a dating relationship would work out. Now, this happened over a year ago, and it was not a long crush, or anything like that, lasted a couple months, she told me no, and she dropped off the map, which i am fine with, cause now that i know her better, i am so glad i never dated her, and thats all i will say. So, this Sloan song was on a mix-tape i made for her and never gave her, but i made it for her none the less. Now, whenever i hear that song, i associate it with that time in my life. And now, i hate that song! The day it was in my head, i couldn't get it out, and i hated it! All day i had this song in my head that reminds of a girl, who i can't stand that i used to like. It sucked, and the longer the song was in my head, the more i continued to hate the song. In fact, i have noticed a general depreciation for Sloan itself since the incident occured. Which is too bad, because Sloan is a respectable band, not to mention a canadian one!

The fact is, this is not the first time this has happened. Certain songs by The Get Up Kids, Weezer, The New Amsterdams, Jimmy Eat World and others have reminded me of other giirls for as long as i can remember. I guess it's a curse and a blessing of mine that i associate relationships with music. It works really well during the time, but once it's over the music is ruined. For instance, i have made mix CD's for Cara since we started dating. There are some great romantic, emotional songs by the Get Up Kids, that would work really well on a CD i make for Cara, but because the album they are off was associated with a relationship with another girl, i don't use them, cause now they are like dirty or used, or associated with times in my life that i don't want to be apart of my life and marriage to Cara. So for me to play those songs for Cara is almost like i am bringing the ghost of another girl into our relationship. She doesn't even know this is the kind of stuff that i think about when i make her mix CD's, but it is, partially cause i am OCD, but also because quite a bit of music has been tainted by sharing it with women who would never be my wife.

I don't even know what i am trying to say about this, like what conclusion i am making other then if you care about music the way i do, sharing it with girls can sometimes cause you to no longer love some really good music, but then again, it's the relationship that makes the music as good as it is. Hearkening back to the Get Up Kids, analogy. Many of my friends thought the Get up Kids sucked, but because it reminded me of a girl i liked, i loved the Get Up Kids or at least the one or two albums they had released by then.

It's funny how the mind/heart works like that. For me, these relationships were me giving away part of my heart and with each part of my heart went a catalogue of music that i have a hard time getting back. Some stuff i have been able to dissasociate with, but certain songs, like Jamie, by Weezer, i doubt will ever lose conotations no matter, how non-existant my feelings for her are, and they are non-existant.

For todays song of the day, i will share with you one of my ruined songs. "Your House" by Jimmy Eat World. That song was ruined by Chloe, and it's a great song, so when you check it out, because i know you have the means and the desire, enjoy it and raise whatever glass you are holding to Chloe. I on the other hand will raise my glass to Cara and the many songs and albums that are the soundtrack to our relationship, which is much stronger, better, and important then any one i have had before.

Anyway, i will talk to you next from the City of Calgary
Peace my friends, thanks to anyone who made my trip to North Vancouver as good as it was.

ps. We are now engaged.
(we being me and Cara)
(or as an english major would say "Cara and I")